When you first wake in the morning, there is a short window of time when everything is right with the world. It is a magical time. You are content for a few moments before you remember and then the world has been turned upside down and the nausea starts. I have found that as time goes by, the nausea doesn't last as long. That is something at least.
Just when I think that I am getting things squared away in my head; just when I adjust my dreams that I thought had died, just when I stop focusing on what we can't do and what we can, we get hit again.
Heterotopic ossification - excess bone growth on the joints which can hinder movements of the joints and make mobility (read - independence) more difficult. Guess who has it? Yep, my wonderful, strong husband. Only about 20% get it. Yeah.
Oh, AND 49% get carpal tunnel syndrome - guess who has that too? Yep.
Really? REALLY? God, I have not cursed you. I have chosen to see your blessings in this. It has not been easy. I have had to force myself sometimes. I have focused on what I know and not what I feel. My heart cries out WHY? Why are you doing this? What lesson do you want me to learn? Why are you allowing this to happen? Is it not enough that he is paralyzed and will suffer chronic pain as a result but now, now, he has these additinal things to happen that will cause more pain and difficulty.
I want to say that it is well with my soul. I really do. Please God.
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