2nd Meeting

    Today, I went to an SCI Caregivers Support Group Meeting.  Have I mentioned that I hate the term "caregiver"? But what else do you call it? 
    Anyway, I went.  Not sure if I get much out of it personally but at least I can be there and maybe I will get something.  The first meeting I went to, I did learn some valuable information.
1.  I was still in crisis mode.  This is indicated by the fact that I lived from day to day and did not plan any further than that.  This is the end of crisis mode and the beginning of survival mode. 
2.  I need to let go and stop doing everything - this moves you out of survival mode to thriving mode (my term). 
3.  Letting him take control of his life means that I get to move back into a wife role instead of a nurse role. 
4.  I  need to take time for myself.  This resulted in my taking a cat nap after lunch on an almost daily basis and not feeling guilty about it. 
5.  Found out a tip that I will not disclose as it might gross some folks out. 
    This meeting I was able to express my anxiety about our 1 year anniversary in 17 days.  I am stressed so PLEASE keep your drama to yourself for the next - oh, let's say the rest of the month.  There were 2 women there who were really in crisis mode.  One was a woman from China - I don't know if she was over here because her son was in an accident or if she lived here now but her son was only 4 weeks from his accident.  Can you imagine?  Her English wasn't very good.  She kept saying that she just wanted to be able to help her son as tears streamed down her face. 
     Another woman's husband and fallen in August - the day we got home and was now a quadriplegic.  She had this hyper-ness about her that seemed to indicate a lack of sleep.  She was overwhelmed and trying so hard not to be.  I wonder if I looked like that? 
    After listening to these 2 women, I feel like I whine.  Jarrad goes to work.  He gets himself dressed 90% of the time.  He transfers himself.  He takes care of his body.  He feeds himself.  Heck - he can turn on the TV AND change the channels by himself. 
    What have I to fret about? 
    My life is easy.